its not stalking. its research.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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