OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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