Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
