Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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