white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
