It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
So here I am, sexting at work.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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