I murdered the dance floor call the cops
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need a sexual gate keeper
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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