her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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