Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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