Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
