You can't motorboat a personality
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
