Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Randomize
