Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
