What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Why did my mother make you get naked?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
