is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Randomize