No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
