i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
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