I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize