that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
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I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
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he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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