I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Randomize
