she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize