you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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