dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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