yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Your cock deserves a montage
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
