it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
