I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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