If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize