Having a random hookup so left but love u
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
