I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
