I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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