Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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