All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
