Tell her she can't have a vagina
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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