I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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