super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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