I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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