is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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