had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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