we're blogging at a bar
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
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