He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize
