never play flip cup with pint glasses
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
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