I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
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