Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
did you just send me my own nude
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize