Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize