We won't sleep together?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize