Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Your penis caused this!
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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