New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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