bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Let's get the cat blown out
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
