Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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