he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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