I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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