I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
